Get Off The Hamster Wheel

Whether we are experiencing personal or professional barriers, disappointment in failed attempts with our goals, or just in a rut all together, we often beat ourselves up out of frustration when we don’t see positive change. We expect different outcomes for ourselves or others while we use the same approach and when we don’t see change, we end up just hitting our heads against the wall, oftentimes feeling isolated, more overwhelmed and discouraged.

My advice this week: get yourself off the hamster wheel. You are probably finding yourself doing and saying the same things over and over again (or better yet, not doing or saying anything at all) as you also long for something different. A phrase I borrow from Denzel Washington is: “Don’t confuse motion with progress”, meaning you can run around the hamster wheel all damn day, but until you decide to stop, jump off the wheel, and try something new you won’t experience change. Like it or not, change must happen from within you first before you see the outward change in you or within others.

A current client of mine started life coaching because she felt overworked and burnt out. Through our sessions it was discovered that at work she felt taken advantage of and underappreciated. She felt like she was the only one that constantly stepped up and took on more responsibility by working longer and harder than her peers. She told me during one session, “everyone can see the stress on my face, but they just allow me to do more and more and more. I try to lead by example and through my actions try to motivate the others to step up and help me out, but no one does.” When I asked how long she had been struggling with this, her response was “years”. She was at the point where she wanted to leave her job. Through our time together, she talked about how she felt like this on other teams in her past.

After several sessions, my client finally decided to get off of her hamster wheel. She began to get comfortable with the uncomfortable outward changes. She stopped jumping up and volunteering for additional projects. When no one else quickly volunteered to take on the additional project, she demonstrated the confidence and courage to speak up by bringing awareness to her team. She talked to the team about how she had volunteered for the last several projects and was needing time to focus on finishing those before taking on additional duties. She said that she was feeling overwhelmed and at times taken advantage of for always being the one to jump up and do. She calmly and without emotion said, “who will be stepping up and taking on this project other than me?” She said everyone seemed shocked that she actually said something other than, “I will do it.” She said at that moment, the team dynamic started shifting. Several co-workers came up to her and acknowledged all the effort/dedication she demonstrates and actually volunteered to help her finish various projects. She said they had no idea that she was struggling and she feels so much better now.

She got off the hamster wheel and did something different. As a result, she saw a change within herself and then with the team.

So, what hamster wheel will you choose to get off of today?

Call me if you are needing or wanting tools and support in taking motion and making progress.

Kate Myers, CPLC

(317) 296-5082

kate@myerssquared.com